seattle ; sunday evening

[necroslacker]

Brid had invited him over to the den for dinner. At first, Sam had been hesitant about going because a necromancer sitting down to a pleasant dinner with a bunch of werewolves didn't tend to happen. But, Brid had cajoled and his stomach had grumbled at the thought of a large meal so he'd relented and gone.

Before dinner, he'd spent some time with Brid, talking with her and laughing and feeling pretty content with things and with her. And then there'd been dinner. He'd hadn't talked much but he'd eaten a lot and his stomach was protesting by the time the evening came to a close and he was preparing to leave.

As Sam was preparing to leave, a gruff voice from behind him asked where Brid had went. When Sam turned to answer, he found himself backed painfully into a wall and staring into the eyes of some werewolf whose name was escaping him. Edgar? No, Erin? Eric! It was Eric.

And Eric wasn't happy. Sam was kind of glad that Eric didn't use his strength to pick Sam up and leave his feet dangling like some doll but the threats coming out of his mouth were enough for Sam to wish he had something else to focus on. Sam was pretty sure this big oaf was going to break him into two if not for the very convenient intervention of Bran.

Bran warned Eric off with a few stern words and Sam was finally freed. His back throbbed but it was definitely not the worst pain he'd ever felt. Bran checked him over and gave him a pat on the shoulder. Embarrassed, Sam kind of just wanted to escape but he'd asked how Bran had found him.

Bran explained that he'd figured something was going to happen when unattached males at dinner had paid Sam close attention because of his connection with Brid. And even trying to explain that Sam and Brid weren't together hadn't done anything so Brannoc had advised Bran to find young Sam.

And now Sam was even more embarrassed that Brannoc had noticed. But, he thanked Bran and he'd headed home. All he really wanted to do was go to bed and sleep off the meal but James, first in cat form and then in dragon form, hadn't made it that easy.

And the fact that Sean, one of Brid's brothers, Frank, Ramon and Brooke were all around when he got home meant he couldn't just skulk off to bed. But, it hadn't been all bad. He'd learned a little from James about how long the man had been there (a long time) and how he didn't tend to give orders to anyone because the house was Sam's and not his.

At the end of everything? They'd decided to get a new refrigerator. So, productive night and Sam finally got to go lay down and get some sleep.

[NFB but open for interactions, if you'd like. Cut and thwacked with a weed eater from the beginning of Sam's canon just to get it going a little further.]

Comments

[necroslacker]

"And what about that makes you call me?" Sam asked though it wasn't harsh. He was just curious.

[whenshewasnice]

"Already called my parents, and I'm letting people in Fandom have some time without me," she replied, shrugging and wondering whether that was the truth. She didn't even know. "Calling Peter would be ridiculous since he was here earlier."

[necroslacker]

"Ah, so I'm just the next best option," he said, mild. He rubbed his eyes and sighed.

[whenshewasnice]

"Not really." Exactly as mild. "But making you the first person to call would be weird too."

[necroslacker]

"Surprised you're calling me at all," Sam told her, shrugging a shoulder. "All things considered."

[whenshewasnice]

"Which things are those?"

No, really. Things between them were so ridiculously tangled by this point that even she wasn't sure what they were basing their expectations on anymore.

[necroslacker]

"The last time I saw you."

That thing.

[whenshewasnice]

Yeah. She remembered. She rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"That was a goodbye to kissing."

[necroslacker]

"Yeah, it really felt the way a goodbye kiss is supposed to feel," Sam quipped, shaking his head. "I was definitely feeling like it was goodbye."

Or he hadn't but, you know.

[whenshewasnice]

"I told you what it was."

She had.

It wasn't her fault they were so good at that that it was hard to stop.

[necroslacker]

"So, you don't want to kiss me ever again?"

He just wanted to see if she could say it.

[whenshewasnice]

Natalie held back a sigh. Mostly. "I don't want to date you right now." The kissing was not the issue. "It's not the same thing."

[necroslacker]

"Why did you kiss me if you know I feel differently?" Sam demanded. "If you knew it was going to mean something different for me than it was for you? That's screwed up."

[whenshewasnice]

"Why did you let me kiss you when I'd outright stated what it was?" Natalie retorted, mildly. "That's screwed up."

[necroslacker]

Sam's lips thinned and he breathed roughly into the phone. He didn't say anything because he'd been close to coming out with something not so nice. So, he held his tongue and said nothing.

[whenshewasnice]

"Yeah," Natalie said, guessing she'd pissed him off with that, at least a little bit. But she'd had nothing else to say to that. "I'm sorry, but it's not always all on me."

[necroslacker]

"I let you kiss me because I'm weak when it comes to you and I take what I can get," he finally answered. "What's your excuse?"

[whenshewasnice]

"I'm weak and sometimes what I want and what I should take instead don't match up."

Because the whole point of breaking up with him was that she couldn't be as attached to him as she was. Except her heart was yet to get the memo to its full effect.

[necroslacker]

"I still don't understand what you want from me."

He really didn't.

"And don't say 'I want to be your friend' because we've proven that we can't do that."

[whenshewasnice]

"Just because it's impossible doesn't mean that's not what I want."

And yes, she did sound a little bit sad and resigned as she said that.

[necroslacker]

"I can't do the impossible," Sam told her, sounding thin. "I don't know what you want me to do."

[whenshewasnice]

Yeah, Natalie didn't either. Well, no, she did. It just wasn't anything he was comfortable doing.

She was quiet. For a moment, then another.

[necroslacker]

Sam thought she'd hung up for a second but he figured the breathing meant she was still there. And he didn't know what to say to her at this point.

[whenshewasnice]

"So do we finally just say goodbye?" she wondered after a moment more of watching what bits of of Port-au-Prince she could see though her window. "Are we finally at such an impasse that we'll just be done? I'll stop calling and you move on with your life without me hanging on to you."

[necroslacker]

"And what is the other option?" Sam asked her since he didn't know. "Is there another option?"

[whenshewasnice]

"I don't know."

She wanted there to be one. She really did.

[necroslacker]

"Yeah."

He didn't either. It sucked.

[whenshewasnice]

It sucked.

And Natalie didn't know what to say. Again.

[necroslacker]

"I don't know what to do," Sam said helplessly. "I really don't. Because you kiss me and it doesn't feel like anything but what I remember. And we're still so good at it. It makes me remember. But, you don't want me. So, I don't know what to do."

[whenshewasnice]

Natalie refrained from pointing out she did want him. She just didn't... want to want him, if that made any sense, and it probably didn't. Feelings rarely did.

"I don't know either," she repeated, shaking her head, mostly for her own benefit. "I wish I could say I wish I hadn't done it."

[necroslacker]

"And really, a goodbye kiss isn't like that? It doesn't last that long and you wouldn't let me take your shirt off," Sam had to point out. "That's a little more than just saying goodbye, at least to me. But, you can have your own opinions."

[whenshewasnice]

"So maybe the execution was a little off," she admitted mildly. "But when did we ever do anything in a normal way, anyway?"

[necroslacker]

"So, what were you hoping to get from kissing me?" he asked. "Were you really just saying goodbye?"

[whenshewasnice]

"Closure," she admitted. "Because it bugged me that I didn't get to participate much in your kiss goodbye."

[necroslacker]

"And did you find your closure?" he asked neutrally.

[whenshewasnice]

"Well, I got my goodbye kiss."

But they hadn't moved on from that in anything resembling an ideal way, no.

[necroslacker]

"That doesn't sound like closure," he sighed. "Natalie, what are we going to do?"

He almost sounded helpless but not harsh. He really didn't know because saying goodbye...wasn't what he wanted but they'd proven that being friendly was near impossible.

[whenshewasnice]

"I really don't know, Sam."

She actually sounded a little helpless. She didn't want to say goodbye. But.

[necroslacker]

"Maybe..."

He sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"I think I'm just gonna go. I'm tired."

And neither of them knew what to do.

[whenshewasnice]

"Yeah. Okay." That wasn't what she wanted to say, but it'd have to do. She didn't have the answers. "Go to sleep, Sam."

[necroslacker]

"Okay."

He breathed quietly and then said quietly, "Good night."

He clicked the phone off and burrowed under his blankets and figured he'd stay there for awhile.